If I were a Builder

I wish I was a builder

Why ever would you wish that? You may ask...

It's quite a simple philosophy actually: If you can't beat em, join em.

What I'm sayin is, if I were a builder, I would look like this:




Or potentially sexier, if that is even possible.

Those curling biceps and rugged khaki-coloured stubbies give me a 3 out of 5 chance that people like this...



... may actually respect me, a teensy, teensy, tiny bit.

I can hear you laughing from your safe little office desks now. Builders? Who wants the respect of builders? I'm pretty sure they are only half human...

Yes, there was a time when I too thought that builders were a ferrel blend of hyena and gorilla, kept locked up behind wire fences or maybe some scaffolding. Poking their heads through the grates only when they want some meat. Growling as innocent female prey pass by...



What has changed my mind?


Well, essentially nothing. But aside from the fact that my previous viewpoint was 100% discriminatory and about 85% exagerrated, it just happens that I get to spend the rest of my year monitoring a real life building site.
This is a Tech assignment which is supposed to give me an appreciation for the complex construction of timber-framed residential dwellings.

But this is not Bob the Builder people. This is my life and I am a little afraid.

I don't want to be the girl who accidentally shoots herself with a nail gun and doesn't realise until years later whilst getting a dental xray...

It could happen.

Most of my class are builders, or used to be builders, or are dating builders. I am just the girl who worked in an office until I couldn't take it any more and went travelling. Then had about 9 months of being a bum (or technically, a part-time chef) before deciding to become a student again.

If I was a builder, I could have a remote chance of actually understanding what I am talking about in class when I give the following presentation to an audience of 70 about how to wire your house and generate your own power:



That would be a bonus!

And when someone in my class said "NZS3640" I would be like "have you noticed there is a new updated section on bracing in the 2011 edition?" and everyone would grunt, (which is Builder for "yeah totally I know!") and we would talk about it and have something in common.

Sigh.

I wish I was a builder.